Yes, sometimes shit hits the fan and it IS okay. It could be something simple like someone bumps into you and readjusts your mood or something bigger like being short on bills for the month. Either way, we have to remember that we are allowed to feel how we need to at that moment as long we don’t cause harm to ourselves or anyone else. Sometimes we need to be sad, or angry, or depressed, or unmotivated to make the ride back to elated, or joyful, or inspired feel that much better.

Life is full of rollercoasters. Highs and lows will be bountiful and, in some cases, day-to-day. Though our experiences are unique, especially when you add perspective into the equation, we are rarely the only ones experiencing something or who have experienced something. Self-love has become a catch-phrase but it rarely includes the achievement steps because they look different for everyone. It could be helpful to seek support. Support can come from family or strangers. It can be in-person or online. It can be through a book or a video. It can be therapy. Black people across the globe are raving about how therapy has improved their lives. Check with Therapy for Black Girls and Black Therapists Rock for leads. If you can afford it, take a few days off to self-reflect without bashing yourself. Analyze where you are, where you want to be, and at least one actionable step you can take.

Whatever you do, don’t fully give up on yourself. Take a mental break. Be kind to yourself. Do what you can with what you have. Make small achievable goals that lead to larger goals, always giving yourself room to adjust and reset if need be. When shit hits the fan, whether in our control or not, we always control how we respond to it. We can make it okay.