don't rush

Don’t Rush a Relationship Just Because They Want One

I’m sorry fellas, but this is another one for the ladies. I’ve been noticing a pattern in men lately where they want things their way. They have this entitled man complex where things are supposed to go how they see fit, with no concern or care for how us women want things to go. Don’t rush. Lemme explain.

Men have been coming into my life and demanding status, demanding title, and demanding exclusivity when they want it. Now, there is nothing wrong with wanting someone to take you seriously, but when it comes to a partnership, it should be done on both party’s terms. Too many times I have encountered men who believe a relationship should happen when they want it and only when they want it. They start using terms like “Ohh you put me in the friend-zone” …don’t even get me started on that one. Never in a million years did I think that because a man had feelings for me, or saw me as a prospective girlfriend, that it would HAVE to happen right away because he says so. Personally, I’ve been living my life on a need-to-have basis. A relationship is a privilege after accomplishing everything I want for myself spiritually. For me, I could not and would not be in a relationship until I am whole and happy with myself alone.

I say that to say this – ladies (men can listen too), do not let a mate push you into a relationship that you are not ready to entertain. You should deal with people how and when you want to deal with them, not the other way around. Create your own rules and your own path. Make sure whatever changes or decisions that are being made in your life are at the hands of you. And when they are, whoever wants to take part, cool. And those who wanna force you into something you don’t want, girl tell them dudes to kick rocks.

 

don't rush

About Shallah Cotto

First name, Shallah. Middle name, Tiara. Im a Brooklyn Girl, born and raised. I've spent time in other places, but Brooklyn, above anywhere else, is home. 23 years young, and I've seen, been through, and been involved in more than you can imagine. I've visited quite a few dark spaces. Right before creating my blog, for example, I tried to take my own life. After recovery, I decided the only way to go from there was up. It's still a process of course, but I realized I have a lot to live for. I'm a daughter, sister, friend, mom (to my dog Herman), dancer, radio host, DJ, mentor, free spirit, the list goes on. I have a purpose that probably hasn't even been revealed to me yet. So, here I go, trying to figure it out just like everyone else. Except for me, my story is here for you to experience with me. | IG @ShallahTiara

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